Many of us carry deep-seated feelings of unworthiness around money—and these feelings often trace back to our childhood. If you grew up with demanding parents, teachers, or even bullies who made you feel like you had to earn love and approval, you might have internalized a painful message: you aren’t inherently worthy. This hidden “money shame” wound can block your ability to receive wealth and abundance freely.
As a mother myself, I’m reminded daily of how powerful words and feelings are for children. Kids’ emotions run deep, and misunderstandings easily happen when adults say things like, “You’re okay,” when the child feels anything but okay. Or when the phrase “You can do better next time” replaces the needed reassurance of “You did your best, and that’s amazing.” These moments shape our internal narratives—often without us realizing it.
While it’s natural to wish the adults in our past had responded differently, the truth is that healing these wounds is our own responsibility. Relying on others—whether parents, bosses, partners, or even money itself—to validate our worth keeps us stuck. Those external sources can’t provide the healing medicine we need; only we can offer ourselves that gift. And that’s incredibly empowering.
Mirror Work: A Simple Practice with Profound Impact
One of the most effective tools to heal money wounds and cultivate self-worth is mirror work. Before I embraced this practice, looking in the mirror was mostly about surface-level things—fixing hair, choosing outfits, or critiquing my appearance. The idea of using that moment to speak kindly to myself or express self-love was foreign.
My daughter’s habit of listing things she loves about herself always amazed me. She includes herself on that list, which was something I never consciously considered. Self-love wasn’t even on my radar.
When you look yourself in the eye and say kind, affirming words, you shift your relationship with yourself profoundly and quickly. One helpful technique is to speak to the person in the mirror as “you” instead of “I” or “me.” (Try both and see what feels right.) This creates a gentle distance that can make the affirmations easier to accept.
Crafting Your Affirmations: Specificity Matters
Affirmations work best when they feel believable and resonate emotionally. You can tailor them to be as specific or general as feels comfortable for you. When you encounter resistance—internal pushback or discomfort—try dialing back to more general or neutral statements. The goal isn’t to force anything but to gradually align with positive, loving beliefs.
Here are some examples to get you started:
Highly Specific Affirmations
(These may be true now or aspirational.)
- “You are so worthy of love. I love you deeply. You excel at making money. You confidently charge $1,000 per hour because your skills and gifts are incredibly valuable to your clients. You speak on stages and are recognized as a thought leader and change maker. You are transforming your family’s legacy through your wealth.”
Less Specific, More Universal Affirmations
- “You are worthy of praise and admiration. You deserve to be well paid. I love you unconditionally. Every day, you believe more in your gifts and see how valuable you truly are. You are worthy simply because you exist.”
Very General or Single-Word Affirmations
(If “I am” or “you are” statements feel too much, focus on the words themselves.)
- “Wealthy and worthy. Wealthy and worthy. Wealthy and worthy.”
- “Open to my gifts. Willing to see their value. Ready to grow in self-love.”
Making Mirror Work a Habit
Mirror work requires commitment and repetition. To help remember, place a sticky note on your mirror or attach the practice to an existing routine—like brushing your teeth—so you build it seamlessly into your day. Many find doing affirmations while brushing teeth makes the habit easy and consistent.
Over a few weeks, you’ll likely notice your internal dialogue softening and your self-worth rising. You’ll move naturally from vague affirmations to more specific, empowering statements that feel authentic and true.
The Gift of Healing Your Money Wounds
Doing this inner work is transformative. It frees you from past conditioning, releases money shame, and allows you to step fully into your gifts. It opens the door to receiving abundance without guilt or fear. By believing you’re worthy of everything you desire, you create space for wealth, success, and love to flow in naturally.
If you’re ready to take this powerful step, know you’re not alone—and that healing your money wounds is not only possible but deeply rewarding.
This article is excerpted with permission from Emily June Wilcox’s forthcoming book, Wounds to Wealth: The Life-Changing Method of Diagnosing & Healing Money Wounds to Receive More Wealth (2024, Em Makes Money Publishing).
Emily June Wilcox is a speaker, author, and entrepreneur who coaches women to heal their money wounds and thrive financially while embracing joy. She lives in Southern California with her family and hosts The Joyous Path to Millions podcast.
